This rings a bell.

These are very common situations and at some point in my life I’ve found myself in all of them (even simultaneously) or had friends that were going through the same shit.

Maybe those people needed to hear some advice from someone whose common sense/experience they trust. They were probably at a low point emotionally and needed support, empowerment whether to make a decision or to carry it forward.

Maybe just the fact of having someone who listens helped them.

I don’t think I could turn my back on someone who requests only my attention or advice but if they’re in a loophole, they can only get out on their own feet…So if they are truly your friends, they will understand when you say to them, in a loving tone: I care for you but I cannot make personal decisions on your behalf, please take your time and come back to me when you’ve made up your mind on this matter; I’ll support you whatever your decision will be.

I am one of those people who enjoys solitude, going to places (pubs, restaurants, museums…) alone and meet new people that will probably become “regular” acquaintances. I’ve lived in three different countries and spent several years on each of them so I’ve gone through all the stages of meeting new people and seen all kinds.

I have very few people I can call “friends” and most of them I’ve met when I was very young: people who love and support you unconditionally, as you do for them.

And yes, I believe it’s difficult to find that kind of genuinely caring, altruist relationship when you become an adult because of the different life dynamics and the personae we grow to deal with them.

Friends are like family, a source of nurturing reassurance and protection, they are our chosen tribe, our wolf pack, and we love them as we need them. And they need us too.